Dark Horse 628 Challenge

Well fellow worshipers of the NECS/MRC, it has been awhile since I have been in a state of mind where I could put fingers to keyboard and write something that was truly meaningless but entertaining. The Dark Horse 628 challenge has provided that fodder for me so here it goes.

You will recall in the last post, Time To Roll A Fatty, that due to a sudden economic upturn in the life of C-Dubbs, a persistent plying of beers by the Mayor to get me into a drunken stupor, and not having fallen or crashed on the test ride, decided that what better way to participate in the 628 Challenge/Scavenger Hunt on the trails of Stewart State Forest then on a fatty – enter the Towelie bike. As excited as a child on Cxmas morning.

I arrived early at Dark Horse to finalize the set up and raid the kegerator for a couple of rounds of some fine craft brewed yeasty malted beverages to ensure optimal navigation and bike handling skills on the trail. A few Montauk Brewery Summer Pale Ales later and I was assured that the odds of getting lost were going to be slim as my teammate, Muttonchops, came equipped with a map.

With such reassurance and the carefree attitude that comes from several beers, we did a bit of team building by hanging around the kegerator and pouring a few more cans of liquid courage down our throats. We lubricated and feeling the new bike fasties we were as sure a bet as California Chrome.

Using a technique learned from the great NJ Transit conductor, Mike “The Calf” Montebano, and to combat Infantile Tom syndrome at the first stop on Ridge Rd I punched all stops on the ticket. Crossing the great swamp the fatties put up such a big wake we caught this shot of the Stewart wildlife.

Pulling up to the turn for the dump at Major Mike we held a quick team meeting and determined that with our superior attitude (of having fun) and superior state of mind (due to a lot of scripture reading) our mere presence in the vicinity of the hole puncher was as sure a thing a actually getting to the sight. Such profound insight enabled us to flip the bird and rail some awesome single track. It was on the Campground Trail that I first discovered that with 4.6” wide tires at 8 psi you can pull some awesome moves that rival Vin Diesel in The Fast & The Furious Tokyo Drifts. Plowing up the climb to the Ranger Station as everyone was passing us going the opposite direction that we had indeed made the correct choice – f*#k the direct route, railing some hardpacked single track was the right call.

After a brief Micro G teleconference where (the rest of the MRC Board was unavailable) is was down the Orchard Trail before a spin by the Beaver Pond, at least we got within a ¼ mile which was close enough for government work, before passing the base of Washboard Hill and racking up yet another hole punch. From there it was a direct fatty roll up Baron Road to the Umbrella Factory and then onto the old steps on Barron Road and onward to Dark Horse Cycles. Pulling across the line in second MacGyver was up in arms not believing that a fatty could have possibly completed the course that fast and he was right. But who cares, we didn’t claim to have finished and in the spirit of NECS/MRC non racing Muttonchops and I were the absolute winners based solely on the great time and awesome trails we rode compared to the dirt roads everyone else rolled. Following the ride we were once again treated to an amazors BBQ hosted by the Mayor & his better half and the Raveinator & his better half. Along with the turf and surf spread there was a bit of crooning with the Makers Mark bottle by the ladies and we want to give a special welcome to a new member – Cathy the Maker’s Mark Queen.