The Grandest Fondo

Well devout worshipers of the NECS,yet another spectacular Non Race is in the books and this one was more epic then ever. So epic in fact that only W.C. Fields could sum up the conditions - Yes, I was truly excited for what is fast becoming a landmark event the riding circles of upstate New York, almost as excited as a 16 yr. old about to be taken by dad to the local brothel for an education in life. As a result I was pacing the the rooms of the house in the predawn hours when suddenly there were several brilliant flashes followed by a tremendous boom and the ensuing torrential downpour. WTF! a thunderstorm at 4am and driving rains that would bring mere mortal riders to their knees (and for some of the NECS Wrecking Crew their mere mortality was revealed on the New Jersey Turnpike). Well fans, prayers were answered when the doorbell rang and it was none other then two time defending Beer Cross Champion, Senor Aqua, first to answer the call to duty. Based on the skills and abilities shown at this year's Beer Cross I knew that his mere presence was going to ensure a truly epic event. Soon after non racers began pouring into HQ faster then lemmings over a cliff and by Non Race time we had a fearsome pack of six idiots about to set out on a Grand Fondo ride in the pouring rain. And when I say pouring I mean pouring. Sure there were the bouts of light rain when in a moment of sheer delusion we all thought it was going to clear, then we saw this in the direction we were headed.With the pending clouds of doom looming ahead we pulled into the local Sack-o-Suds where provisions were taken on for the push to the Cima Coppi, the summit of Peekamoose and the 10 Euro prize.Earlier in the ride Fat Chick (aka Jenny Craig) noted that the last place we wanted to be in a passing thunderstorm was Peekamoose. Well a quick "fuck that, we need to do some climbing" from El Obamador and we were off to the backwoods of Peekamoose and the pending downpour which came shortly after hitting the base of the climb.While all of this was going down with the weather there was a whole other non race going on within the non race - the KoM competition and the bragging rights for bagging the Cima Coppi and the coveted "left over from the Giromania trip" 10 Euro note. At the base of each climb I. like Christian Prudome, would call the start and immediately it was El Obamador, Senor Agua and Tom Hill shooting off into the distance while Fat Chick, MacGyver and C-Dubs hopped on the Auto Bus to make the time cut. So casual were the three of us with some of the climbs that we took time out on the Cima Coppi for this shot of the waterfalls that come out after a good rain.Shortly after this the summit warriors were headed back down the mountain expressing serious concern for the well being of Team Lantern Rouge . Having secured our safety it was a group ride up Peekamoose until we passed what had been mistaken for the summit. Realizing the coveted Cima Coppi was still wide open the usual suspects sped off for the summit and Grand Fondo glory. This was the scene right afterwards –
The descent off the backside brought some of the heaviest rains of the day and for those of us with carbon rims and cork brake pads some of the scariest moments of the day. There is nothing quite like the feeling of having the break levers pulled to the bars, hands cramping and the bike slowly gaining speed! By the time every finger bone had broken from the pressure the road had finally straightened out and it was a high speed race for the bottom and you can imagine just how good the rain felt hitting your face at over 40 mph.
Having our fill of rain the decision was made make for a direct line back to HQ and the cooler full of growlers and bottles of IPA. This still left us with almost 30 miles to go so it was time for some serious pace line riding in the downpour which looked like this -
Finally back in the shelter of the man cave the high fives went around and everyone agreed that it was truly epic event and that anyone who rolled back under the covers instead of riding had a very poor decision.
KoM Champion – El Obamador
Cima Coppi Winner – El Obamador
Tom Hill is introduced to the infamous Team Seagal Braquito